Goodbye Maternity Leave

My maternity leave is ending. I am so sad. I can hardly even talk about it. But I know it’s coming and I have to figure out real life, life with job and baby. How do you people do it? Mamas, I’m talking to you. How the heck is this possible? To leave my sweet baby girl and go worry about website hits and sales numbers? Argh.

Part of me is excited really, to get back to work. I like my job and I miss the thrill of success and the agony of defeat. Okay that’s a little dramatic, but you get what I’m saying. I miss the work. I miss the people. The adults, that actually talk back to me during the day. I miss having something to think about other than nap schedules and whether we have enough diapers and did I run the dishwasher.

I have to be honest though, I am having a seriously primal reaction to leaving my baby. Like, the hormones are going crazy I might have to fight off a lion I will kill anyone that looks at her reaction. And I know it’s normal and natural and mothers are programmed to react like this, but it’s really hard to reconcile my head and my heart. This is the plight of the working mother I guess, that thing that everyone goes through. We want to work, but we want to be with baby too. And we don’t get to do both.

You don’t get to do both.

And it sucks.

So yeah, Monday is the day. I go back and leave my little girl for the whole day. And I’m supposed to act like a grown up. Guessing that’s not going to happen. So any advice on how to handle it? Aside from bringing lots of tissues?

 

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3 thoughts on “Goodbye Maternity Leave

  1. Ughhhhhh. This is the worst part. The only thing I’d say is to remember that it only gets better. So when you’re miserable on that first day, things will only improve from there. Though I know that’s cold comfort in the moment. Hang in there! And yes, lunch soon please. xo.

  2. It will be okay. It sucks, but it will be okay…eventually. You just have to get through the hardest part – Day 1…and then you get through Day 2…just like everything else in life it’s about one foot in front of the other…

  3. This day totally sucks. You may need to go to the bathroom and cry (speaking from experience) and do little things for yourself that perk you up throughout the day.

    Believe me, every mom goes through this and it is not easy. Thinking of you today.

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