There’s this one scenario in my mind where everything is easy. Things are in place and moving along smoothly.

Then there’s this other scenario.

It’s called reality.

This past weekend was good really. There may have been a minor blowup about whether or not I was helpful in *Lowe’s, but aside from that, really fun.

*Short version:

Me: I was so being helpful!

John: You were the complete opposite of helpful! I will kill you.

Let’s just say we never really settled on a winner for that argument.

We did however, paint the nursery. And lament about how we’re spending too much money on everything but we’re powerless to stop it. Who knew a baby could be so expensive?

Everyone? Oh yeah I guess so.

I also got to the gym, got a massage, walked the dog a whole bunch, caught up on Thursday night TV, and got to see good friends. All in all a great weekend. Except for the Lowe’s part. I guess I feel fine about it though, because I’m pretty sure that at least one out of every two couples walking around Lowe’s or Home Depot is arguing about something or other.

Anyway, back to my scenarios. I do have these perfect scenarios of life in my mind, but it’s just not working that way somehow.

For instance, I want to write in this blog and have it be a place to chronicle my life and all my thoughts about the world. I can’t help but censor myself a little though, because I know the rents are reading. (Hi mom and dad – see, no F word anywhere in this post!)

I also want this not to become a mommy blog, but I’m kinda thinking it’s taking that turn. Sorry folks, that’s what’s going on in my life. I wish I could take beautiful photos of salted chocolate brownies, but I am too busy reading weird birthing stories from Ina May’s Guide to Childbirth.

I want to be one of those active pregnant ladies, the ones who are still going to kickboxing and running 10ks and what not, but it turns out that I need a giant sandwich after just 30 minutes on the elliptical, so that’s just going to have to do for now.

I want to not get annoyed at that person at work who is doing that thing that I’m not going to talk about, but man it is annoying me.

I want not to be cryptic but I am.

I want to read the New Yorker like I used to and be informed about my world and not just worry about what vanity will look good in our tiny bathroom.

I want a margarita. A big giant margarita. A good one too, no sweet and sour. All lime juice and salt and tequila.

Oh did this just turn into a list about all the things I want? I guess I could go on and on.

It’s fine though, it is it’s all good. I think thinking about all of the things I want to do really makes me a better person. It makes me strive to do better. Be better. Wanting a margarita makes you a better person right?

Goals for 2010

Happy New Year! I hope everyone had a fantastic December. I know I did. Our trip to Mexico was lovely, as was visiting my family in Texas for Christmas. I’ve been back in Denver for a week now, and that time has been filled with celebration as well, including my 30th birthday and of course ringing in 2010. I love the holidays, I love the laughter, the fun, the craziness of it all, but I have to admit, I’m also quite happy things will be settling down a bit.

As many do during the new year, I’m taking some time to think about what I want for myself. I find this to be especially important now that I’ve turned 30(!). I realize I still have so much of my life ahead of me, and I want to make sure that each day has a meaning and a purpose. So in that vein, here are some of my goals for 2010.


  1. Focus on the positive and enjoy my life. I’m a worrier. I fret. About everything. Ridiculous things. And at times, it can have an incredibly negative impact on my life. I lose sleep, I get stressed, and I let things get me down. This year, I’m going to try to reverse that trend. I’m going to do my best to stop worrying about things I can’t control, and focus on the positive. I have a great life, and I need to embrace that.
  2. Find work. I mentioned I had two potential opportunities before I left for Mexico, and although I feel I gave them both my best effort, unfortunately neither worked out. I am putting everything I have in to remaining positive about the situation (see above), even though rejection is definitely not something I deal with well. I know I will find something that is right for me soon.
  3. Stick to our budget without getting crazy about money. I really want to find a happy medium when it comes to our finances. We’ve created a budget using Mint’s online software, and so far it is going fairly well. What I really want to do is focus on saving in the right places (eating out) and spending in the right places (for us, it’s traveling).
  4. Get creative in the kitchen. I have a tendency to stick to the same types of recipes, and even though I like trying new things, they are almost always in a category that I’m already comfortable with. Since I don’t eat pork or red meat, dinners are typically vegetarian or based around chicken or turkey, which the occasional piece of salmon thrown in for good measure. This year I want to try new things with fish, eat vegetables I’ve never heard of, and attempt to cook a dessert that seems totally out of my league.
  5. Reduce my alcohol and sugar intake. These things are serious vices for me. I love wine. I love sugar. But I know they cause my arthritis to flare up, they interfere with my sleep, and they are catalysts for other negative behaviors. I know I’ll never eliminate either from my diet completely, I just want to become more aware of how much I consume.

So there you have it, my major goals for 2010. I also have several personal goals that I’ve recorded privately, but you know those are none of your damn business! 😉

So what are your goals?